That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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