Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Everything about him screamed your future.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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