Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize
