Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
