he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Randomize