Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
