i just wanna soil my oats bro
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
