so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
