All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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