Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
