He is such a slut. More and more my type.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
