Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
