In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
the liver wants what the liver wants
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
