Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Boobs speak an international language.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
