So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
