Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
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