She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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