I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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