guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
