There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
