I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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