Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
