He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
My vagina just clenched in fear
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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