i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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