yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
