I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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