woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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