I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Holy shit dude........stairs
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
