i don't plan on having that self control this summer
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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