Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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