I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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