we have pet lesbian snakes
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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