whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
