So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
