Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
