Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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