he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
