I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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