My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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