Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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