I cannot find my penis.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
