I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
