She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
if only i could text you this smell
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Randomize
