so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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