Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
