Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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