we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
