i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
