Ambien. No doubt about it.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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