Hey man sorry I got all grabby
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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